I don't remember this.
What I do remember though is some interesting things that happened as of last week since I wrote in my journal .
From what I know now,some cosmic event happened and now I'm pretty fucked in the head ,covered in runes and well,as it turns out,I'm a dark magician of some sort,which makes sense considering the fact I dabbled like crazy with my mates cross pond. How I know? I woke up in a strange place with an endless number of bloody rooms,a labyrinth of a place called "The House of Mystery".And the great part is the bloody place is haunted by the ghost of some bloke who claimed we use to know each other ...
Anyway ,it all started when I woke up alone and naked in a room to a strange voice of some bloke callin "John,John,wake up".And it was urgent,like maybe it was worried...HE was worried... like maybe something happened to me something bad and that thought alone was enough to have my heart beatin.Things got worse when I realized I was right in the middle of a summoning circle.There were lit candles,blood sigils, even human bones about and I completely lost my shit.Because I've done things like this ,seen these things before...but to have it happen to ME is another story altogether.
Thinking about it when i write now still frightens me.
That and that before then,there was void,nothingness,screams and silence,so deadening that when I woke up,I felt like I was coming back from the dead.
Maybe I was .
"You're awake",the voice says...and somehow ,I knew I knew that voice,I just knew it but couldn't place it.
"Calm down...deep breaths,John",the voice coaxed .I did manage to calm myself down.
"Okay,okay,calm...but who the fuck are you,why am I here?What did you do to me?!",I demanded of him.
"John Constantine,born May 10th,1953,died,unknown, disapeared from history...",he said .I could hear pages turn,but still no one around.
"...or do you prefer this one,born March 12th 1980 died 2013 from...unknown causes...or perhaps is this one...",he said pausing.I meanwhile was trying to find the source of the voice but I was locked in that empty room,a bedroom specifically... and he continued to speak...
"...John Constantine ,born October 30th 1994 died December 25th 2016...I'm sorry,who commits suicide on Christmas? Yeah,that's definitely one for the books",he said,and saying that made me freeze up because I remembered it.
I remembered wandering through the cold,climbing into a roof,I remember being in Time Square...which I know I'm English,so what the fuck was I doin' state-side anyway?
(I know, now...I remember...I was a runaway..can't run further than out the country,right?)... I was watching the smiles,laughter cheers,and feeling empty inside...and I remember walking to the edge,laughing..an "Well...Merry Christmas mutherfuckers"...and someone screamed that wasn't me...
And when I remembered all that,I laughed.Not because it was hilarious,but because it was ironic,yeah?
"You're right,Mr.Ghost ,or whoever you are.Bloody ironic,yeah? Happiest day of m'life ,best Christmas gift ever...and it went to shit though...cuz if what you say is true,then I fucking survived it!",I said.
"You survived because the world isn't through with you",the ghost says.
"O'course it ain't.Fuck all what I want...fate's got me by the balls again",I said,and yes,it's true,so very true.
Then my old pains were coming back,the pains from before,the things I'd seen,I'd done..some of it not even me but somebody like me maybe...
"My pa said I was born before all Hollows Eve because m'just a bad omen.Why would my livin' be a good thing? Far as I can tell,we know each other,so maybe you can enlighten me on that",I said.
I really didn't want an answer though because I am so very tired of people consoling me,tellin' me it's gonna be alright,cos once I fuck them over,by accident or no,I'll be damned to burn for a thousand eternities and all those sweet words would mean nothing.
"I don't have an answer for that.And if I did,you either wouldn't like it,,shrug it off or reject it",the voice said...and he's so very right and I didn't like that...which is why I was checking around for a rope,something sharp...somethin' to finish the job for good.
"I know what you're thinking John...you want to finish the job.And that's not happening",the voice said.
"Why?!Why not,who the fuck are you to tell me what to do!",I snapped.I was hysterical,I was on edge,and that out burst was most definitely out of character,but I was in a bad way then,so obviously I was acting out.
"Because I'm one of the people out there who actually gives two flying shits about you,that's why!Now get dressed and I'll explain to you what's going on ,on your way out",he said.
"Fine...fuck it!What choice do I have?",I said ,because I just had to get the last word in.
The drawers I wanted to get into magically opened now,thanks to 'the Voice'. I opened the drawers and closets,it was clear that maybe a couple lived in this place--a couple and their son maybe? The clothes were 3 types,sexy goth wear for the lady (whoever she was,she was clearly my type.Fishnets and lace,and leather on ladies always gave me a thrill).
The next set was all business for bloke #1 ,suits ,ties and such,which is what I went for because honestly something tells me it'd be smart to stand out as little as possible.I did wanna go for some of the son's things,cuz it was more my taste,biker jackets,studded bracelets ,torn jeans,band T's--but it reminded me of something negative I didn't want to remember,something I can't put my finger on so I left it.
But what drew me in the most was the beige trench coat hanging in the closet.It was like the thing was calling me and I could feel the--magic? Or occultic energy or whatever we're calling it... so I put the thing on and I felt like I was alive again.
The first thing i did then was reach in the pocket,took out a pack of cigarettes and two very intricate looking zippo lighters that I could just feel buzzing with life (because according to a note from guy named Nick,the bloody things could summon hellfire ]. On the gold one"John" was crudely scratched and for a moment,I remember being handed something like this.
And the other one had "Nick".
The ghost then tells me there are two more,another for this Nick guy, and one for a lady friend of his.
That's how I found out about Zatanna,who was the owner of the lady clothes in the drawer and the lighter that was like ours but white and made electricity dance across my nerves when I touched it,like Nick's but devoid of the darkness.After all that,the voice told me that Zatanna would come looking for me some day and that it was best that I found her and gave her the lighter.According to him,she's the type of person with a lot of love to give,and maybe,that's what I need right now--
She also appears to have a very high aptitude for magic,because the lighters I found were crafted by her,mind you,they can summon flames from the depths of hell.Maybe she can help me get the answers I need.
No comments:
Post a Comment